TRAGIC
FARCE: A COMEDY IN THREE ACTS
Act
Two: Brand New Way(continued)
~*~
“The dragons were cool,” Gunn said as the credits scrolled.
“Not to mention Matthew McConaghy. Dayum.”
Gunn stared at her. They were sprawled comfortably on Cordelia’s
couch watching movies. Lately they’d been spending a lot of
evenings this way when there weren’t any helpless that needed
helping. “Cordy, what’d I tell you about trying to be
all Ghetto gal? And didn’t you tell me I wasn’t allowed
to drool over Miss Bootalicious Berry in your presence?”
“Cause life isn’t fair?”
Gunn snorted. “Well, Duh.”
Cordelia sniggered. “If I can’t do Ghetto, then no
Valley for you.”
“Deal.” He leaned forward for more snacks and was disappointed.
“Hey, woman, we need more salsa. And chips. And guacamole,
and tequila. Must more tequila.”
“Must more?” she snickered. “English is your
only language Charles, don’t abuse it. And get me a Breezer
while you’re in there.”
“Shit.” But he got up.
Re-supplied, they watched The Matrix, which Gunn had seen more
times than he was ever admitting to. He’d bet he hadn’t
seen it as many times as Wes had though. There was more drooling
on Cordelia’s part.
“Keanu. Whoa.”
Gunn raised an eyebrow. “So, that’s what you like.”
“Yeah. Well, not only. Larry’s kinda hot too.”
“Hey, don’t feel like you have to find the brother
attractive just 'cause I’m here.”
“O.K. I don’t think he’s that cute. You know
what would be great though: if they got Denzel for the sequel. Denzel
in a long black leather coat. That would be the shit.”
“Cordy, don’t let me have to tell you again about the
Ebonics.”
“’Kay. Want to watch another flick?”
“Yeah, sure.”
“My pick.”
Cordelia really liked The Truth about Cats and Dogs: smart brunettes
beat clueless blondes, amen. She was grateful that vampires didn’t
snore.
“You can wake up now. It’s over.” Cordelia nudged
Gunn’s shoulder. He sat straight up, drowsily confused.
“Huh. Oh. So uh, what happened?”
“Not much. They overcame their difficulties and lived happily
ever after, blah, blah, blah.” She switched off the player
and leaned back against Gunn, yawning.
“Gettin’ late.”
“Yeah. And you’re still way too drunk to drive. You
can crash on the couch.”
“Thanks.”
”Um.” Neither of them moved. It was just too comfortable
like this. Cordelia felt safe with Gunn around. She knew he’d
stand between her and any danger. She knew she could trust him,
he’d never let himself get sidetracked by some blonde obsession.
Gunn was her stand-up guy.
“So, you think Angel would ever let Wes come back?”
Gunn asked.
Cordelia froze. “I hope not.”
Gunn frowned. “That’s kinda cold. I miss him and we
could really use…” Cordelia raised her hand.
“Gunn, stop talking now. Wesley’s on my don’t
want to talk about list.”
“He’s our friend. I know he fucked up, but he saved
all our asses when Angelus got out and…”
"No! He left me with Angelus for *two days* Gunn. Because
pulling me out of hell wasn't a priority. "
“It wasn’t his fault, I’m the one who I let you
down. Let both of you down.”
The deep sorrow in his voice and his face killed her rant. "Gunn.
You did everything you possibly could. You didn’t let me down,
or Fred."
“I woulda moved to Texas for that woman,” he said quietly.
“She knew that, right?”
“Yeah, she knew everything about me.”
“That’s something no-one can ever take away from you.
And we know she went to heaven. If anyone deserved it was her.”
“Hell, I might even have a chance, we know they ain’t
too picky, they let Buffy in.”
“Yeah, but they kicked her out.” They swapped half-guilty
glances before dissolving into laughter.
“You’re evil,” Cordelia sniggered.
“Naw, I’m bad. Big difference.” Gunn grinned.
And then he kissed her.
Oh. Kay.
Gunn was a damned good kisser. His lips moved on hers like he was
trying to tell her something important. She was pretty sure she
knew what he was trying to tell her, but she wasn’t sure what
her answer was. She'd never really thought about Gunn that way.
Sure she’d noticed he was a hottie, she wasn't blind and it
wasn't that he was black, because: Eric Benson and also Denzel.
Maybe it was that he seemed so young, with that baby smooth face
and those big brown eyes…though he’s actually a couple
years older than her. Maybe it was just that he joined the group
so late he always seemed like a junior partner, whatever. And then
he fell for Fred which considering that Stick-figure Barbie comment
(for which he still needed to pay) was kinda funny and well, she
didn’t poach.
Dear God the man could kiss. His cool and gentle hands traced up
and down her back. There were so many reasons why her answer ought
to be sorry, no. But she couldn’t be bothered with any of
them. She felt the tension in him go as her mouth opened and let
his tongue slip inside her mouth. They sat there, tongues and lips
dancing and sliding, tasting each other until she had to breathe
and pulled away.
“Damn, Cordy.” They stared at each other, Cordelia
gasping for breath, Gunn gaping in shock.
“Damn yourself Charles. Where’d that come from?”
“Been saving it up for awhile now.”
They looked at each other, uncertainty and heat crackling between
them.
“Oh. So was that it?” Gunn’s slow grin made a
pulse throb deep between her legs.
“Hell no. Plenty more where that came from – if you
want it.”
He was looking at her just a big puppy dog, she could kick him
and he’d still love her. But why the hell would she want to
do that? “Yeah? Well bring it on.”
She wanted him. Goddamn. Her eyes were huge and dark and when she
spread her legs just a little the undeniable perfume of desire drifted
out. Sweet Baby Jesus, Cordelia wanted him. He was twisting on a
wire, caught between panic and joy. It was a damn good thing his
soul didn’t have an escape clause.
A flicker of doubt ran across her face as he hesitated. Gunn realized
that this was not the time for a whole lot of thinking. This was
action time.
He moved, had her pinned with his hands on either side of her head
before she knew he was moving. He buried his face in her throat
and took a deep long breath of her. Expensive fragrances, clean
slightly damp skin, youth, good health and everything that made
up her unique scent.
He nibbled teasingly along the delicate line of her collarbone,
while deftly unbuttoning her blouse. Her breasts trembled with the
force of her gasps and giggles till it looked like the lacy purple
bra might not be able to hold them. He worked his way down to her
chest and the valley of her cleavage. He pressed his open mouth
against her sternum, tasting the salt on her skin his whole body
ringing with the rhythm of her heart. She moaned, her leg rubbing
against his crotch and he swore he felt every downy hair on her
legs through the denim trapping his cock.
“Hey!” Cordelia complained when he tore off her bra.
She forgot about it the next moment as he sucked a nipple into his
mouth. She groaned and arched off the bed, reaching out blindly
for him to pull him closer. His hand moved between her legs to the
source of the scent that was filling his head. He traced her folds
with his fingertips then probed delicately inside her. The feel
of her, wet and soft clenching around his fingers was nearly enough
to set him off but he controlled himself. Not gonna blow this. One
finger, then two, moving in and out of her, his thumb doing the
friction dance on her clit while his mouth and other hand played
with her nipples. Her skin was flushed with her arousal and part
of him hated that he thought about the blood but another part didn’t
really care because she was here with him and she was screaming
as she reached her peak and biting down on his shoulder and Fuck!
White light exploded behind his eyes and he collapsed beside her.
“God,” she said when she could speak. Gunn smirked.
“Nope. Gunn.” He jumped up and gathered her up into
his arms. Kissed her startled mouth. “Gonna teach you to say
it tonight if it’s the last thing I do.”
~*~
The red letters glowed against the dark screen when she double-clicked
on the file.
WARNING: Non-authorized persons detected accessing
this file will be terminated.
Lilah pricked her finger and calmly pressed her bleeding thumb
to the screen. There was a faint chime as the document opened.
Name of Project: The South Central Candidate
Goals:
Locate suitable containment facility
Status: Complete
Ensure that facility is fully supplied and modified
Status: Complete
Hire Security Staff
Status: complete
Hire Field Operatives
Status: complete
Hire Specialists
Status: Complete
Acquire Subject
Status: Pending
Not for long, Lilah thought, closing the file.
~*~
Cordelia struggled back to consciousness, and wished she hadn’t.
Her head felt like a leaky balloon and there was a hamster nesting
in her mouth. It took her a little while to realize that she wasn’t
alone. Her bare ass was spooned into a firm, slightly cool male
body, one brown-skinned arm draped around her waist. Three guesses
who, and the first two don’t count. Oh yeah, now she remembered:
movies, alcohol, Gunn, unfuckingbelievable good sex…
She didn’t have any idea what they’re going to do.
So she just laid there and enjoyed watching Gunn sleep. He really
was a pretty man. His long lashes lay dark against his smooth brown
skin, none of that vampire pallor for him. She kinda thought he
was better looking now than before not that she’d ever say
so. Gunn still wasn’t exactly happy about being a vampire
though he’d sure made use of the physical advantages last
night. Da-yum.
Gunn opened his eyes as though he’d heard her thinking in
Ebonics. The look he sent her was more than a little nervous.
“Hey.”
“Hey.” She smiled and rested her hand on his chest.
He put his hand over hers and she relaxed a little.
“So, what is this? Uhm. Us I mean.”
“Fun? Good friends having some fun, together?”
“Yeah, yeah. O.K. That’s cool.”
“I mean, it’s not like either of us is in any shape
for serious commitment, right?”
“Yeah.” He squeezed her hand and they lay there together,
comfortable. Daylight crept around the edges of the curtains that
Dennis, bless him, must have closed before sunrise. She could hear
her neighbors getting ready for work, doors slamming, cars starting.
Should she start calling him Charles? Or Charlie, Chuck, Carlos
– naw, Gunn’s good.
“I guess you can’t leave until sundown. Guess I’d
better call Wes and tell him you won’t be in.”
Gunn went very still. “Oh shit. When Angel finds out about
us he’s gonna lose it!”
“Huh? How’s he going to know?” Gunn tapped his
nose. Cordelia grimaced. “Oh, ew. Forgot about the super senses.
Well, you can just tell him you stayed over at my place and, um,
I loaned you some of my clothes.”
Gunn was unconvinced. “Right, I’ll tell him I sleepwalked
into your bed.”
“Don’t think he’ll buy that one?” Gunn
just looked at her.
Cordelia sighed. “Me neither. Dammit, it’s not like
it’s any of his business anyway!” She started working
herself into a good mad. “He’s with Buffy! ”
Gunn snorted. “Get real; we both know better than that.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. As far as he’s concerned it don’t matter
that he’s doing Buffy, you’re still his.”
“Pfft. The hell!”
“Don’t give me that evil look, I ain’t Angel.
And don’t act all surprised, like you don’t know he
watches you. All the damn time. Sneaking around the office trying
to be sly. I don’t know how the hell blondie’s missed
it.”
Cordelia snorted. “Hell, that’s easy: Angel stalking
me doesn’t fit into Buffy’s world, so it never happened.”
“Neat trick.”
“Seems to work for her. So. What’s the plan? Buy a
couple of tickets for Tahiti on the company credit card? Or confront
Mr. Broody and point out there’s nothing in the employee’s
handbook banning in-office dating?”
“I was thinking more: we shower, you lay on the perfume and
we both stay as far away from Angel as we can until the evidence
fades and we can pretend this never happened.”
“Oh. First part – sounds good, but that second part
– do you really want to play it that way?”
Gunn’s eyes were very dark and serious. “Hell no.”
Cordelia let out the breath she hadn’t realized she was holding.
“Well, good then.”
“We’re playing with fire here,” Gunn said.
“So? He’ll have to come through me to get to you.”
“Holdin’ you to that Barbie.”
~*~
Wesley looked up from his book as a soft breeze ruffled his hair.
“Fred,” he said with a smile as he watched her coalesce
from the air. Now that she has the hang of it, she can make her
image so sharp and opaque it was only when he tried to touch her
that the illusion was revealed.
“Hiya Wes, whatcha reading?”
“Ah, a new translation of Nibelung’s Swartzen Wasser.
It includes material that was omitted from the previous 1889 edition…
Where have you been?”
“Over at the hotel, checking in on Charles.” She almost
told him that he’d been up on the roof kissing the hell out
of Cordelia, but stopped herself. She couldn’t see any harm
in Wes knowing, but she’d never been good at making those
kinds of judgments and she suspected she’d gotten worse since
her death.
“Ah. How are the doughty warriors of Angel Investigations?”
“They’re doing better. And don’t be snippy just
because Charles hasn’t called you, he’s been very busy
lately.” Busy sneaking around with Cordelia behind Angel’s
back, she thought with a little smile. “Why don’t you
call Charles?”
“I wouldn’t want to make a nuisance of myself.”
Lord, she hated that little self-pitying sigh of his. Swear to God
if she ever got the chance she was gonna put her foot so far up
Wyndham-Price Senior’s butt he’d end up with athlete’s
foot of the tongue.
“Wesley, stop being an ass. Gunn’s your best friend.
Call him!”
“Fine. I will.”
“Well?”
He gave her a sullen look but picked up the phone and dialed.
“Hello, Gunn? Wesley here.” He looked like someone
expecting a blow. “Yes, so how are things going? Good, good.
Ummm. I don’t suppose you’d like to go out for a few
drinks…“ He laughed. “Certainly fewer than the
last time... Friday night around 8 at the John Bull? That will give
me a chance to kick your arse properly at darts. I’ll see
you then.” He hung up with a smile on his face.
“Now that wasn’t so hard, was it?”
“No. You were right. Again.” He frowned. “Gunn
sounded a trifle distracted. I hope there’s nothing wrong
with him.”
“He’s fine.” Fred said, manifesting what she
hoped was a convincing smile on her face.
Wesley studied her for a moment, then looked away. “Ah well.
So, you were at the hotel.”
“Not all day. Part of the time I was with Dennis. Like I
told you, he’s been teaching me how to move things around.
Ah hate this. Not havin' a body just makes me so mad.”
“I don’t know, at least you don’t have to worry
about being injured.”
“Wesley, you know I love you, but you can really be a jerk
sometimes! Do you know what it’s like to not be able to touch
anyone or anything? I can’t call my parents. No-one but you
and Lorne can see or talk to me! Being a ghost sucks!”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t think… wait, you love
me?”
“Of course I love you! Always did.”
“But you and Gunn…”
“Wesley, I knew you were kinda interested in me, and I was
definitely willing to be interested what with that sexy accent and
everything, but you weren’t doin’ anything about it.
Charles was just so sweet and he didn’t leave me in any doubt
about how he felt.”
“I suppose if he could see you, you’d be with him not
me.”
“Dammit Wesley! Yes I love him and of course I want to be
with him.” She came closer, stepping into the tabletop so
she could be nose to nose with him. “But I love you too, and
bein’ as I’m dead I figure I don’t have to play
by the old rules. I don’t want to choose, and I’m not
goin’ to. You all are just going to have to live with that.”
“You want both of us? And suppose I – or Gunn didn’t
wish to share?”
“Then one of you is going to lose out.” He looked at
her as though she’d grown an extra head. She checked just
in case. Nope. She relaxed and smiled at him.
“Well… It’s all fairly academic in any case.”
“Oh, I don’t know. Haven’t been watching Gunn
all day. Mostly I was with Dennis, taking lessons. Want a demonstration?”
She moved closer, her hand rested on his as it has many times before,
weightless and utterly insubstantial. He jerked in shock when he
felt her ghostly fingers resting on his.
“Fred! I felt. I can feel your hand! How did you…oh!”
He gasped as Fred shifted her attention to a more intimate area.
“Told you, I’ve been taking lessons from Dennis.”
“Dennis? Where did Dennis learn – oh my good Lord!”
“Well, he used to…” Just in time she realized
she might not want to give out Cordelia’s private business.
“Uh you know, like I said, just teaching me how to manipulate
matter.”
“Fred!” he gasped before losing the power of speech
entirely.
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